The First Two Years of Conquering the Tundra

Experiments in Orientation 
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August 25, 2009

Saddam Hussein

If you read my old wordpress blog, this is a re-run.  Hey, it's summer.

   
Click here to download:
Saddam_Hussein.zip (143 KB)

I got this amazing art at a local bar a few months ago.  I saw it on the floor leaning against the wall and offered the waitress 100rmb ($14) for it.  She said that the owner of the bar drew it and she would have to talk to him.  When he came in later in the night, he brought it over to our table and introduced himself.  He didn't speak any English, so his friend translated.  He told us about how amazing Saddam was and how he was a great leader and how terrible America is.  Doug (also an American) and I just agreed, telling him things like "Oh yeah, America sucks.  That's why we're here in China.  It's so much better."  I would've said anything to get my hands on that drawing.

Since then, the oddest thing for me isn't that one Chinese dude loved Saddam so much he drew this work of fine art that says "Deep heart for Saddam" in Chinese along the side.  No, the weird thing is how many other Chinese people tell me the exact same god damn thing.  "Oh he was a great man!"  "He stood up to the Americans."  When you respond the them with "You know he killed a ton of his own people, right?"  They act like that's not even worth considering.  Also, I've heard the sentence "Hitler was a great man" more times in China than I ever thought I'd hear in my entire lifetime.

Anyway, as you can see, Saddam watches over me now. 

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July 22, 2009

Well, I've Sold The Paper To The Chinese - From the Onion
via theonion.com

This week, the Onion was apparently sold to Chinese "Fishing Technology" company Yu Wan Mei. All of the articles are written as if they were from or controlled by China. Check out the Yu Wan Mei site as well, "Fish Time is Success Time!"

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July 9, 2009

Find of the Day: Gen 13 Action Figure

Earlier today I went down to the Sanhao street / computer market area to pick up some DVDs and Nintendo Wii games (I'm babysitting a Wii over the summer).  As I walked around one of the computer shops, I noticed an action figure/toy store with this gem on top of it's pile of 5rmb sale toys.  It was Caitlin Fairchild, the leader of Gen13.

       
Click here to download:
Find_of_the_Day_Gen_13_Action_.zip (220 KB)

J. Scott Campbell's boobalicious Gen13 was one of my favorite comics when I was a kid.  It was never as interesting as X-Men or as dark as Spawn, but it was risque and more adult than most other comics.  And by "adult" I don't mean it had complex themes or even much violence, I mean every female character had massive cleavage and was practically nude on every page.  It was awesome.  

The weird thing about finding this toy is that I had no idea they even made Gen13 action figures.  It's from 1998, which would've been around the same time I read it, though maybe a little later.  If they weren't mass produced, I can see why.  I don't remember any of my other action figures having painted on thongs.  It's also an odd thing to find in China because they don't even have American comic books here and even if they did, Gen13 would probably be considered pornography.

The package wasn't in very good condition, but Fairchild and her accessories are all there (and little dusty), she comes with a laptop computer, dumbbells, and a big ass gun.  No pants though.

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